Remember how I told y’all I was headed to China? Well, plans change, and I am no longer heading to Asia.
Let me explain. Visa work is awful (as I’m sure some of you know). I pushed back my start date for China 5 times because of visa hang ups before I finally cut my losses. However, the visa hang ups were not the only reason I am no longer going to teach in China. After thinking out loud while working at a summer camp a few weeks ago (summer camp makes you think y’all), I realized that I have never dreamed of living in China. Not that I’m against living in China, it just didn’t seem worth going through hoops to go to a country I’m not passionate about living in. After I finally said it out loud, I immediately wanted to cry from relief; a huge weight had been lifted after months of stress and worry.
I have since realized that I currently really, really want to be in Europe. However, I also don’t necessarily want to get a visa for one specific country. So, I have decided to work towards my new dream of becoming a digital nomad in Europe. So far, this has proved difficult, as it is (understandably) hard to transition from extremely part time freelance to full time writing. I’m currently applying to jobs like crazy and working to leave the US in October (fingers crossed!) along with a great adventuring friend who also wants to explore life as a digital nomad. This is a big goal, and I appreciate any good vibes, advice, or job referrals you can share.
Speaking of freelance writing, do you need some quality content created? My portfolio can be found here; I’d love to hear from you at CelinaTTolbert@gmail.com
I’m scared y’all. In fact, I’m terrified. A week from now I’m moving to a country I’ve never visited (France, for those who haven’t been following my au pair adventure) to live in a city where I have almost no friends. I’m putting my life in two suitcases and leaving the only country I’ve ever known to go on a crazy adventure. And although I’m excited to move abroad and live my expat dream, I’m also really afraid.
I’m afraid that I won’t make friends and the family I’m au pairing for won’t like me. I’m afraid I’ll say something horrible in French and embarrass myself out of the country, making me a nomad with no home. I’m afraid the stylish skinny people will turn up their nose at my frumpy frame and trying too hard outfits. I’m scared that I’ll be alone in the city of love. I’m scared because I’ve never been out of America, no matter how cool and cultured I try to be. I’m scared I’ll lose my friends back home and everything will be different when I return.
I’m terrified of change.
But what I’m more afraid of is never doing anything. I’m terrified of never doing anything and never going anywhere. I’m afraid of sitting on my laptop for the rest of my life watching other people accomplish what I dream of. I’m scared of staying in my comfort zone and missing out on adventures and relationships. I’m afraid of living a stagnant life.
So I’m leaving my safe comfort zone and heading out with the digital nomads and American expats worldwide. I’m going to live so that I don’t have to ask what if. I’m going to follow my dream and go on an adventure that will change my life. I’m moving abroad – because I’m terrified.
So here goes nothing. Follow me on my au pair experience in Paris and see where it takes me.
Spoiler alert from Celina in the future: All roads lead back to Paris 😉
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