Why You Should Care About Ferguson

I’m not here to preach at you. I’m not here to tell you what side to take. I am here to tell you that racism in America is very present. I’m here to tell you that my skin color gives me privilege that some people don’t have, and that that is not okay.

This summer I had the privilege to work at a camp with a very diverse staff and campers. Before camp started I had the chance to learn about racism in-depth. I was reminded that racism is far from over.

You know what sucked about this summer? I couldn’t always relate to my campers because I haven’t ever really been put down or left out or discriminated against because of my skin color. My campers had almost all been mistreated because of their skin color.

Although this summer took me out of my comfort zone, I am thankful for the opportunity to learn from others firsthand about the prevalence of discrimination in America.

Get informed. Seek information from both sides. But whatever conclusion you draw, don’t think that racism doesn’t exist anymore. White privilege is a thing, even though it shouldn’t be.

I am not perfect, but I’m working on helping out the fight for equality, and I hope you will as well.

My First Vlog! The “Get To Know Me” Tag

Hello gorgeous readers! I have been dabbling with YouTube for a while now and finally decided to post a video to my personal channel! So in addition to my posts here I will be doing a vlog at least once per week! I’m really excited for this new endeavor and it would mean the world to me if you’d consider subscribing to my channel! Feel free to comment here or on my channel with ideas for new vlogs! This video will tell you a lot about me, and hopefully makes you laugh during the process! Thanks for following my blog and being awesome!

Here is the video!

When Life Hands You Lemons…And Then Takes Them Back

Yesterday was interesting. A week or two ago I had submitted to work on a film that Alex Wolff was working on. Because of transportation issues I wasn’t able to get to set to be an extra, so I was pretty bummed out. Just for the record, I don’t usually do extra work, much less unpaid extra work, but it’s Alex Wolff, ya know?

Also a week or two ago I decided I wanted to study in LA next fall. Honestly, I’m still not sure if this is a desire of mine or God’s, but I’m praying about it. Anyways, I was (and am) worried about how to find the money for this endeavor. I had also interviewed with a camp that I’d really like to work with and really wanted to get an offer for that camp for next summer.

So yesterday morning a I got an email from a casting person with the Alex Wolff film asking for my availability on Friday and Saturday. So I said I’d love to come to set Saturday. The casting lady says that’s great, that I’d actually get paid(!!!), and that she just has to check with the AD. After waiting all day, I get an email saying I’m “on reserve” and that they went with women who looked a bit older than me. So basically if someone dies I get to drop everything and go to set on Saturday.

Also yesterday morning-ish I got an email form that camp offering me a job – at their day camp in Chicago. I was really excited! However, after calling my mom, I was less excited. She reminded me that I’d be making significantly less than last summer, and obviously this wouldn’t help me raise enough funds to study in LA next fall.

So right now I’m really confused – why does life keep handing me lemons and then taking them away? Also, could you pray for me/keep me in your thoughts about this LA thing? I really, REALLY want to go, but I’m really discouraged because of my money situation.I thin it would be a great learning and missions opportunity. I would study film and acting in a Christian environment, but be out of my comfort zone in a huge city, and I think it could potentially be the best semester of my college career.

Love you all,

Celina

I Don’t Love You Anymore

My writing was shared on The Fickle Heartbeat!

The Fickle Heartbeat

The Unfinished Conversation

Shared by Celina Tolbert

I don’t love you anymore.

Your faith no longer inspires me. Your texts don’t brighten my day. Your sweaters don’t keep me warm. Your glasses don’t fog up when mine do in the cold. Your jokes don’t make me laugh. Your smile doesn’t give me butterflies. Your head on my shoulder doesn’t give me hope. The CD you gave me doesn’t sound good anymore. I broke the promise I made to you.

Because

You don’t share your faith with me. You don’t text me. You don’t give me your sweaters. Your glasses aren’t in the cold like mine are. I don’t hear your jokes anymore. I never see your smile. You don’t rest your head on my shoulder. That CD has no meaning. Our promise is no longer ours.

I don’t love you anymore. And you don’t love me. You never did.

Do you…

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Celina’s Weird Travel Adventures – To and From NYC

There are many different ways to travel in these fifty nifty states. There are planes, buses, and trains. I have done all three in my travels to and from the Big Apple.

Before I was officially offered a job at a summer camp in upstate NY, I looked at flights. And I actually found a reasonably priced first class ticket. I have flown a decent amount in my life, but have never flown first class. I wanted to book it, but I had to wait until I was offered the job.

Well, literally the next day I was offered the job.

So, I went online to book my ticket…and, of course, it was gone.

I ended up flying with a really cheap company which I will not name. It pretty much sucked. I had to pay extra for everything. However, I got a window seat and the middle seat was empty, so I got to talk to the old lady in the aisle seat when I got bored of my music and magazines. She was a nice old lady visiting her daughter.

I loaned her a magazine because she was THAT nice.

That’s pretty much it for my trip to NYC. Oh, and by the way, Laguardia is very strangely shaped. It’s basically a long skinny line. And it’s old and dirty. But there are many nice people in vests that help you.

Now, my ride back was just cray. I had to leave camp early due to school, which forced me to make some weird travel arrangements. I was broke at the time because I was waiting for a paycheck, so my options were extremely limited. It was either a sketchy Chinatown bus or the more expensive train and bus combo. So I chose the bus.

And immediately regretted it.

I was so freaked out that I started asking the campers if they had ever been on one and whether I would die if I rode one. At one point I almost bought the train ticket, but then I stopped because, oh yeah, I’m poor. Even though I was sure that I would die all by myself in NYC traveling via bus, I decided to buck up and do it.

The day comes for me to leave camp. Luckily, my favorite Australian friend came with me (to ensure I wouldn’t die). We took a train to the city (which was pretty nice, but more expensive than I thought) and then took the subway to Chinatown. We proceeded to find somewhat good food and then Dunkin Donuts. Because who doesn’t love Dunkin, especially up North? We finally get to the bus station and wait. Finally, an elderly woman says my bus is leaving, so we all follow her as she runs and yells at us in a language that is not English. We all run across the street and miraculously don’t get hit by oncoming cars. We arrive at the bus, which is ready to go. I shove my suitcases in the luggage thing and say a teary goodbye (good day?) to my bestie from down under and head onto the bus. This nice old lady lets me have the window seat! There are so many nice old ladies in the world.

Anyhow, we drive for a bit and then stop for gas. I go get a drink and return. Then the nice old lady offers me fruit! Can you believe it? Strawberries AND grapes. Some might say it’s risky to take fruit from a stranger, but I was already on a sketchy bus, so what the hay! I couldn’t sleep the whole time, so I got to see the beautiful and boring countryside of Delaware and Maryland. Oh, and the ocean.

When we finally got to my destination, my family was waiting for me and freaking out because the area wasn’t the best in town. I laughed because of the sketchiness I had been through.

This is not a complaint post, because I do not regret traveling the way I did. However, if you have the funds, I’d say first class all the way. If not, Chinatown buses really aren’t that bad, even when there is a crying baby. Bring a good book and ride it out. Trains are also fun, and less expensive than planes for shorter distances. And budget airlines are okay if you either want to bring very little or are prepared to pay extra…lots of extra. So here’s to happy traveling! Stay tuned for more of my weird adventures!